I'm Not Saying My Lovelife Sucks, but...
...this comic is a little too apropos these days:
Caution: Man Lamenting Below
Or, y'know, man whining below, depending on one's point of view.
See, the thing is, I'm not so lonely these days. Mostly. There was a period of time six months ago or so (or, more honestly, up until just a coupla months ago) where the romantic loneliness was palpable, but the non-romantic loneliness started to abate. I began to enjoy being by myself more again, but was being careful to not lose the desires to be around other people that I think I gained while in my last romantic relationship. (Follow that? Can you explain it to me then?) In a way, I don't like to distinguish between general loneliness and romantic loneliness, because I think the lines are often arbitrary and also often avoidable. And yet, there's no denying that I'm still feeling lonely for romantic love in a way that I'm less likely these days to feel lonely for friendship-ish love. What is it that I'm craving? Daily interactions (which, strangely, didn't used to be a component to romance, for me; see what I mean about arbitrary?), sex, intimacy in various forms. It would be nice to have somebody with whom I could trade off some 'taking care of' duties. All of this stuff, except perhaps for the sex part (at the moment, no sex buddies), I actually get from friends. But I suppose it's a matter of frequency and intensity.
Most of all, though, I miss the feeling of building something with somebody. Again, I think I build things with friends, too. I'm building a relationship with my nehphew. I've got lots of building going on. But that committment to build something together in a day-to-day lasting way that includes the intimacy of sex and sleeping in the same bed (sometimes, at least) and being a part of each others' families (which isn't something I've really experienced, in my romantic relationships, now that I think about it)--part of me longs for all of it.
But.
Part of me isn't much interested in it. Despite recent entries to the contrary, I've got shit to do. There are things I enjoy doing, and I enjoy doing them alone. Eventually, perhaps, I'll find some pseudo-loner like myself who also enjoys her alone time to the nth degree, but who also wants to spend the whole day and night with me, sometimes. I have no doubt, really, that there are others out there 'like me' in this way (oh, and she's likely a devout atheist, nonmonogamous, around my age, politically left, health-conscious, and cute as a button)--what I do doubt is that we'll ever meet each other, given our natures, which sort of dictate sporadic forays into looking for love, followed by long-ish periods of not wanting to foray at all...
Filed under:Comics as Life
...this comic is a little too apropos these days:
Caution: Man Lamenting Below
Or, y'know, man whining below, depending on one's point of view.
See, the thing is, I'm not so lonely these days. Mostly. There was a period of time six months ago or so (or, more honestly, up until just a coupla months ago) where the romantic loneliness was palpable, but the non-romantic loneliness started to abate. I began to enjoy being by myself more again, but was being careful to not lose the desires to be around other people that I think I gained while in my last romantic relationship. (Follow that? Can you explain it to me then?) In a way, I don't like to distinguish between general loneliness and romantic loneliness, because I think the lines are often arbitrary and also often avoidable. And yet, there's no denying that I'm still feeling lonely for romantic love in a way that I'm less likely these days to feel lonely for friendship-ish love. What is it that I'm craving? Daily interactions (which, strangely, didn't used to be a component to romance, for me; see what I mean about arbitrary?), sex, intimacy in various forms. It would be nice to have somebody with whom I could trade off some 'taking care of' duties. All of this stuff, except perhaps for the sex part (at the moment, no sex buddies), I actually get from friends. But I suppose it's a matter of frequency and intensity.
Most of all, though, I miss the feeling of building something with somebody. Again, I think I build things with friends, too. I'm building a relationship with my nehphew. I've got lots of building going on. But that committment to build something together in a day-to-day lasting way that includes the intimacy of sex and sleeping in the same bed (sometimes, at least) and being a part of each others' families (which isn't something I've really experienced, in my romantic relationships, now that I think about it)--part of me longs for all of it.
But.
Part of me isn't much interested in it. Despite recent entries to the contrary, I've got shit to do. There are things I enjoy doing, and I enjoy doing them alone. Eventually, perhaps, I'll find some pseudo-loner like myself who also enjoys her alone time to the nth degree, but who also wants to spend the whole day and night with me, sometimes. I have no doubt, really, that there are others out there 'like me' in this way (oh, and she's likely a devout atheist, nonmonogamous, around my age, politically left, health-conscious, and cute as a button)--what I do doubt is that we'll ever meet each other, given our natures, which sort of dictate sporadic forays into looking for love, followed by long-ish periods of not wanting to foray at all...
Filed under:Comics as Life
posted by Jeff Pollet at 7:30 AM
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